I’m a Single Girl…..Golddigging…..

Writing by Jes on Sunday, 21 of June , 2009 at 8:01 pm

 

Why are you single?

And he is standing there staring at me.  Looking for a reason a flaw.  And I am staring back at him. Blank. 

So he repeats.

Why are you single? 

And I think to myself, “Hell that is an excellent question, I let you know after I take a survey of all the ghosts of exes past.  If I can find them.” 

I mean, I’m the one standing in the parking lot with a wind chill of 50 degrees below sanity in three inch heels acting like I am walking with a natural arch in my back.  With a mini skirt that exposes flesh that has been running three miles a day underneath the lie of “trying to improve my health” but secretly wanting some nigga to cock they neck back and place their hand near that craving section and whisper “gottdamn” whenever I walk past.  I got the suffocation vest on, in attempt to show my bottle shape curves and midnight make-up caked on my face in dire need to go home and moisturize in efforts to keep my “all natural youthful presence.”  So, I’m made up like a buck fifty in the middle of a night stroll and no matter how much of a rent, utility, cell phone, or whatever bill I scrounged up what little money I could just to find an outfit to make me stand out like a peacock on a crayola high…. I got to do the justifying.

I’m the one being questioned about my motives with a less than par nigga in my face like something is wrong with me after hearing about how he is a chef…at KFC and he moving up to fryer in a month.  And don’t get me wrong, I have nothing, NOTHING against a blue-collar worker, and NOTHING against a white collar…I just feel though after age thirty, you should be wearing collar.  Nothing personal, just something called GOALS.

 Why are you still single?  A sip on the beer cup.  Not even glass.  A cup…. A disposable cup…reminds me of my love life, not shit solid and the first sign of wind it all splatters to the ground.

Like there is something wrong with me.  I have to answer like there is a special potion or magic dusk that was cast on me and I am waiting to be rescued by my prince in shining armor from the tragic fate of single life for all eternity.

Why are you still single?

So I answer.  I’m a gold digger.

And he huffs, and I laugh…then state.

No really.

A bonifide, high marching gold digger.

I am a gold digger…. Then I am shocked at my own revelation…because of the truth that is the undercurrent of this proclamation.

I am a gold digger, on constant grind…search, mining, scoping, looking for that real deal, that substance, that stuff that is below the surface.  Yep…. gold digger…well actually, a gold digger works in shifts…I stay on the clock, 24 hours, 7 days a week.  Looking for that premium quality.  So, not only a gold digger but also a neurotic one at that.

And as I watch that brother walk (run) away in efforts to keep his $6.75 wages in tact, I smile. Because it’s not that another one bit the dust.  It was that there was too much cubic zecrom, when I am digging for a diamond.

See most of ya’ll are holding wallets, watching me with a weary eye.  I don’t want what you got.  See you on that Kanye West “Golddigger” medley.  Remember this is a poetry piece, there is always a deeper value here and it ain’t nothing to do with a bank account.

So while ladies waste their time in search of a person to place them in gold, I commend them but my objective is to locate the substance that makes him golden.  That makes him shine, go through the dirt and emerge at the top ready to receive his crown. 

See understand the life of a golden nugget. A Gold nugget is usually only 70 - 90 percent gold, and the remainder mostly silver. Silver is a good element, but it is known as a knock off.  You couldn’t afford the gold watch, you pick up the silver.  It’s the back-up brother, the just in case cousin.  Then you have to look at the color. The color of pure Gold is bright golden yellow, but the greater the silver content, the whiter the color. Or maybe I should say, the more sold out the color is, dimmer, dusty, not full-breed, lower quality.  The more of that second rate stuff there is, then the less the value of the gold.   

Most Gold is mined from ore, called the “Momma Rock”.  Momma rock contains tiny amounts of Gold in her core. To extract the gold and become of value, the ore must be removed (or can I say, umbilical cord) and then the gold can be counted of valued because it is no longer tied to or holding on to something to supplement its worth. 

Gold is less commonly found as nuggets. Nuggets are formed when erosion causes a large piece of Gold to separate from its mother rock, and then gets carried away into a stream or river. It goes through this course of life, on a journey that will only prove to shape it and mold it to the priceless specimen that it shall become.  The flowing water tumbles the Gold, giving each specimen a distinct shape. So that he, I mean, it is a unique individual…true to his cause.

He can go through any obstacle, mountain, trenches, terrains, lakes and when he surfaces to the top with a little love and care he starts to sparkle again and gain attention. Then he takes his travels and is able to withstand the heat of the fire when someone plays attention to him and he becomes a beholder of a jewel.  Why is this import because, the Gold in himself has been prized for its beauty, resistance, workability, and tenacity, but most gold recognizes that it shines only harder and brighter when there is a jewel or a work of art available to showcase together.

So, now I know that I am on a shift.  A manic man in a minefield…. looking like Kid Cudi, Day and Night, where there ain’t no mountain high enough, no valley low enough…on a Toni Braxton fix…for seven whole days, until I can find a piece of gold that has be extracted from the momma rock, tumble through life’s journeys, able to withstand the heat, with proven workability, and the patience to arise to await his jewel. 

 

And if you still think this poem is about what is in a brother’s pocket…you need to check your substance chart because you may find yourself with a little too much silver in your element.

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